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Those decisionsMay 22, 2015

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Fours years ago this morning our lives changed. It is a morning I’ll not forget for excitement stood in the air almost as thickly as apprehension. It was my husbands last day at work.

When I met Zeljko he worked in a shop, he had a regular (if decreasing and unreliable) income and he’d never really been out of work. We didn’t really have much of an alternative income at the time, our float was depleting and donations were thin. Life wasn’t easy, married just over 6 months, I was still adjusting to the a more permanent foreign life, and Zeljko’s work was beyond taking the mickey. Even the basics such as eating had failed, I was skipping meals daily and failing to find my feet cooking when Zeljko arrived home. Some of the resulting conversations are etched clearly in my memory.

I’ll not pretend that the decision we made back then was easy, but it was the right one. We stepped out into the unknown and what followed was life changing. From helping add a little content on a website Zeljko has slowly turned himself into a programmer and discovered something he loves to do. I had the tools and the right number of nudges to build a website full of kids ministry resources that is now used worldwide by thousands of people every month. Finding our feet and projects we love have given us things to build on, opened doors (like joining CMS), and helped us establish a more stable and healthy life in the city we call home. Being bold meant being open to blessing greater than we could imagine.

7 months ago this morning our lives changed big time. We held our first born child. Bringing a child into our lives was a huge decision. Zeljko is still considered officially unemployed, our lives rely on a careful balancing of visas and our bills are paid by money which is either irregular or reliant upon goodwill. While it may seem crazy to add a child into this mix we know already some of the great blessings it’s brings. As we enjoy the light we know darkness can ascend at any moment, yet we also know that we can boldly move forward, continually trusting in God’s provision.

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